Being Pepys (sort of)

I guess in the spirit of the great man himself (Sammy Pepys) I'd better actually report something from the news. I'm not a Royalist so it grieves me to waste some of my brain power to do this but (sigh) here goes. Prince William got engaged to Kate Middleton (is that her name? Hang on, let me check.......yes it is). She's pretty and got good teeth. It's probably good to get some new genes into the Royal pool. Hopefully the premature baldness gene will start to phase itself out over the coming generations. As for the ring - Diana's ring, well, I wouldn't want that fucker! It was given to the bloke's beloved mother by a man who never loved her and just saw her as a brood mare to give him an heir and a spare. Remember that engagement interview where he wouldn't say he loved the poor cow? "What is love any way?" or something, that was his answer. I'd have told him to fuck right off there and then. At least the new two look like they at least like each other. I might feel more benevolent if the rumour that we'll all get a day off work for the wedding is true. Wa-hoo, Royal Wedding (said the person considering being a Royalist for the day or, working day. Royalist until 4.30pm).

Enough about the Royals. I've done my diarist's duty.

Oh yeah, I might have mentioned before that people are having difficulties registering to follow this diary. I've also discovered that it's nigh on impossible to leave a comment at the bottom of each entry. Dunno if you have to be a follower or if I need to change a setting somewhere but I'll have a look. I welcome all comments so long as you aren't offering to kill me or sell me a fucking handbag.

So, what else? It broke my heart but I went back to the gym today. Stayed until I did 500 calories but was particularly pissed off 'cause there were CHILDREN in the gym and their voices go through me. Oh yeah, and they were all over the machines I wanted to go on. Who let kids in fer chrissake? I'll tell you what else broke my heart today. SOUP. I stupidly took soup with me to work for lunch. When lunch time came around I wept real tears of grief. Who fucking wants soup for lunch? I ventured out in search of more interesting food and discovered that the guy I thought looked a bit like former Dr Who, David Tenant and therefore was forced to fancy (despite his career of standing on a corner with a sign pointing to McDonalds whilst simultaneously handing out leaflets), actually doesn't. He looks more like a goblin. With a hood on he's hot, without one he's frightening. That upset me too, gonna have to find someone else to have a daily crush on now. Oh the life of a single, barren spinster eh?