Tales of the dead

So, my dog died.  He was great actually, he loved being dressed up to look ridiculous to the point I had to spend many an afternoon photo shopping his erection out of the photos I was to post on-line.  Hang on, I'll post a photo of him:

Batdog - Scouser disguise

He was old and sick and whilst it broke the hearts of the Tidiness Nazi and I we had to send him on his way in the end.  Shit.  So, yesterday we took him to the beach to scatter his ashes in the sea.  It was supposed to be a beautiful moment but during this tender moment the tide lapped up around my legs and I ended up with a tide mark of sea water and dog cremains all around the bottoms of my jeans.  That was a precious moment for my memory bank. It put me in mind of when the entire family went to a lovely hill with my Grandfather's ashes, had one of those tender family moments where everyone has a laugh reminiscing about funny stuff the deceased has done, and then scattered him to the wind.

....which promptly changed direction and blew him back into everyone's eyes.  Terrible, it really was (she said, stifling a laugh).

Actually, that reminds me of another dead story involving the dog.  A few years ago the Nazi and I took him for a walk in the local park.  A bit further down the path and to the side there was a solemn group of people standing around a bush.  As we got near they sort of dispersed and walked towards us looking all sad and we realised they had scattered someones ashes around it.  The dog only went up and pissed all over the lot didn't he?  The horror of trying to shout quietly at a pissing dog so as not to alert the crying mourners was a nightmare of biblical proportions (she exagerated).  Looking back at the people, my eyes on stalks, hoping against hope that no one would look back was terrible.  On the way back later a little Yorkshire Terrier was pissing all over them too.  There's a lesson for us all, DON'T scatter your relatives ashes around a bush in a public park.

Here's another pic of the dog.  He's wearing Halloween teeth in this shot and this seems to be everyone's favourite pic of him.:

Halloween Teeth

Oh god, I've remembered yet ANOTHER dead thing to tell you about now!  A while back I learned that my Grandmother's ashes are in my mother's airing cupboard and have been there for bloody YEARS. 

My Grandmother

The family can't seem to find a convenient time or place to scatter them. More recently my Uncle Clive's ashes joined her.  Seems we have another aunt's ashes somewhere in the family too so I'm guessing that is my legacy.  A cupboard of dead relatives.  Niiiice.