So begins my new Diary

So, hey...first entry in a new blog. I wonder how Pepys started his diary. Note to self - must read the Diary of Samuel Pepys or even Google it. One thing's for certain, I bet he didn't have to go for a paddle in the sea with his elderly dog in order to let the waves wash the streak of globulous diarrhoea from his arse end. I did. Myself and housemate Steph in fact. The globulous lump didn't immediately wash off and with a fair amount of dismay we realised we were going to have to help the situation, so with the long plastic ball throwy stick thing we scraped away in full acknowledgement we were standing in a flow of diarrhoea-ry sea water. Great.

So, went to visit Steph's insane father. I call him Wazza but that's not his name. Funny thing is, he answers to it now. This is a typical conversational exchange with him:

[Location: in my car for I am giving everyone a ride to the local pub for some lunch]

Wazza: Is that your umbrella?

Sket: Erm, yes. It's on the back shelf in my car so yes, yes it is indeed my umbrella.

Wazza: I've got a good umbrella if you need one.

Sket: Well, thank you but I think we've already established that I've got an umbrella and it's on the back shelf of my car. It's also incredibly hot and sunny so there really isn't any need to have an umbrella led discussion.

Wazza: [muttering about umbrella based ingratitude]

Actually, now that I note this brief conversation I realise it is NOTHING compared to some of the conversations we've had with him.

I'm going to leave it here. I've got a very important 5 hour assessment for a new job tomorrow and should really be preparing and showering. Procrastination is a wonderful thing (in the loosest sense of the word 'wonderful')